It will soon be Thanksgiving, when we gather with family and friends to eat, drink, and probably watch more than a little football. We think of it as a day of rest and the opportunity to indulge in mom’s buttery, herb stuffing and, of course, warm apple or pumpkin pie, loaded with a generous portion of fresh whipped cream. We complain about the calories, but that doesn’t stop us from having seconds.

In 1863, Abraham Lincoln declared Thanksgiving a national holiday. It was partly inspired by Sarah Josepha Hale, who wrote letters and editorials to the government for 36 years, advocating for a holiday that promoted unity across the nation. There is no doubt that Lincoln knew the time was right for such a holiday, with the Civil War in its third year and no sign of peace and unity.

The proclamation itself addressed the nation’s civil strife. It acknowledged the suffering and loss of many, the need for healing, and the end of the war. It also called for gratitude for the shared blessings of our country, “the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies”.

While we often picture the Pilgrims and Indigenous people sharing a harvest meal, the Thanksgiving we know today owes much to a different chapter of history.

I had no idea that Thanksgiving Day promotes national unity, the end of suffering, and gratitude for this country. This gives Thanksgiving a whole new flavor (pun intended). In some ways, Lincoln’s call for unity in a time of national division still feels as relevant now as it did then.

As a communication coach, I dedicate my time to helping people connect and communicate more effectively through deep listening and compassionate speech. When we communicate this way, unity isn’t an issue because it comes from genuine interaction, even when agreement isn’t achieved. When we aim to understand each other, we realize that diversity and unity can coexist. The question is, are we willing to become a bit more vulnerable and listen when we’d rather just pass the mashed potatoes? Your call.

This is me and my dog, Ginger. I love dogs — but more importantly, my dog loves me. At least, it feels that way. She helps me cope in these confusing and troubling times. When I’m stressed, all I need to do is spend some time with Ginger — petting her, cuddling, just being together.

My favorite thing, though, is taking her for a walk in nature. I can wake up in the worst mood, but as soon as Ginger and I hit the dog park, I’m laughing, breathing deeply, and soaking in the beauty of nature — and the hilarious antics of the dogs. Suddenly, all is well.

And this isn’t just “nice.” It’s science. When I make eye contact with Ginger, it increases both of our oxytocin levels — the hormone of love and trust — and calms us. Ginger feels loved, I feel loved, and we both experience lower levels of stress hormones. Together, we reset.

Still, I’ve heard people say they’d rather be with their dog than with any human — that they prefer their dogs over neighbors, coworkers, or even friends. As a lifelong dog enthusiast, I understand this, but I find that view concerning.

No matter how much we love our dogs, they can never fully understand our words and ideas, our need for connection, or our drive to create. They can’t provide us with the deep sense of belonging and identity that human relationships give. Dogs can comfort us profoundly, but only another human can give our lives true meaning and shared purpose.

So if you know someone who feels that humans don’t measure up, reach out. Get closer. Listen and share. Because that person is probably lonely — and yes, one can be lonely, even at a dog park.

My Dog, Ginger — and the Power of Connection